Future Forever

Hello and welcome back! Remember me? Probably not. In case you do, last time we spoke, I spent most words raving about what a great time I had in China. I left there almost a year ago and felt it was time for my blog to return. Before we get to the real, juicy meat, though, let's talk about what I've been up to since I left China.

The past few months I have mostly been busy believing in myself. Probably the scariest thing I've ever done. Definitely, the most liberating experience I've ever had. It's scary because you have to take full responsibility. It's liberating because you unleash the most anarchic version of yourself. Even though this sounds like a peaceful transformation amidst self-care rituals and crystals, the reality is far different. Coming home from China, I was ready to apply my newfound confidence and take over the world, but instead found myself confronted with a familial tragedy and an ongoing loss that has changed my life forever. No stranger to strongly shifting twists and turns, I did the only logical thing and adapted. Something that has always been relatively easy for my chameleon soul. It's not for everybody, though.
In the past few years, the number of people suffering from depression and other mental illnesses increased drastically. Such a sudden rise indicates that many people seriously struggle with adapting to new and unforeseen circumstances. So what to do about it? I don't have the slightest clue and am even more confused looking at the changes coming to our health care system in the next few years. It seems as if those in charge don't care about solving the mental health crisis. So I suggest we all start running around in circles screaming "climate change" and join the choir of the crying pronouns every second Sunday to free us from hell, Roko's Basilisk, or whatever the threat will be next week.

I'm joking, or am I? I'm not sure myself. All I know is that I have had a fair share of darkness in my life and have seen quite a few things. What's that help, you might wonder. It might not help, but I am sure talking about the dirty, violent, and disgusting parts of finding self-worth and how painful it can be to learn to love yourself is long due. Even more so considering the emerging culture of influential public figures coming out as depressed, burned-out, or suffering from anxiety, which is a step in the right direction but often suffocates in its infancy. They herald their diagnosis as honorable badges and present a prepackaged version of their struggle that, in its content and vocabulary, is confined by what is socially acceptable in the realm of talking about mental illness.
I want to counterpose a different perspective or various perspectives, for that matter, because mental suffering is not a fashion item guaranteeing compassion and community to the average person. Instead, it terrorizes their every move and often pushes individuals to the outskirts of society.
Individuals that care about their dreams just like you and me. Individuals that hope a little bit of light will strike them one day. It's not in the hands of anything supernatural, though.
I believe education remains the best solution to social stigma. Educating the public about mental pain, cultivating extensive support for those in need, and contrasting anguish with love are necessary steps to save the minds of future generations.

As out of character as it might be for someone like me to imagine a better future, I believe in a protopian world. A world in which the youngest and the oldest dare to believe in themselves, don't give a shit about constrictive social standards and are a little more slutty with their dreams. Speaking of slutty, due to my late discovery of the original Sex and the City series, I am dedicating this summer to being a little more Samantha Jones than Winnie the Pooh. I feel that it is time to put having studied and admired sexually free, confident, mold-breaking women for almost three decades to use.

Generally, it seems necessary to remix some light into the dark, tormenting rave bass dominating our minds. Sampling some beats and vocals of others for the soundtrack of our lives is a good start. I mean, isn't it always about starting? There never seems to be the right moment to start, but coffee certainly gifts it in the morning. Mondays are good to start losing weight, and eight o clock is a great time to tackle a to-do list. But in the end, we are always stuck in starting to arrive somewhere. We pay little to no attention to the things happening in between, the nuances and ideas swiftly touching our minds as our tunnel vision stays focused on the end. It's a crucial mistake, costing many of us the desired healthy routine or success. After all, there is research behind everyone annoyingly reminding you that life is a marathon and not a sprint. You can start reaching for the stars, but nobody is actually going to grab them if we don't do it ourselves. And let me tell you, the stars are shining bright, ripe, and juicy up there. So let's put on our neon astro-suits and defy gravity together. Future Forever. Collin.